


the good old fashioned way

by thisisgermy



Category: Dominos "Avoid the Noid" Commercials, yo noid 2
Genre: Accents, Explicit Language, Gen, Lazy story, i dont know anything my guy, robot murder, spoilers for yo noid 2 ending, stupid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-02
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-06-01 07:13:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15137921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisisgermy/pseuds/thisisgermy
Summary: throwing die at a floating man that sings? nah. how about a more hands on approach?





	the good old fashioned way

**Author's Note:**

> started: 2/7/2018  
> mr. green is in yo noid 2 as a playable character now so thank you for my fucking life yo noid 2 team. if not for the laws of the invisible wall mike would be dead from catching mr greens fists  
> holy shit over 1,000 words apdfhgfsd

he'd lost interest in what was happening the moment he'd entered the ~~noid~~ void. a random assortment of pizza toppings, domino pizza boxes, a vast emptiness; really, it wasn't enough to captivate his attention, and he was still pretty salty about his recent loss to the noid. to make things worse he finds out his yoyo is missing off his person, and that was _before_ being teleported to where ever the fuck he was now. and sure, he found his yoyo, pretty recently after he'd lost it too, but god, at what cost? 

 

at first he thought it was the red bastard continuing to make his life forevermore miserable, but when he paid attention to the details, he realised that that was giving noid _way_ too much credit. sure, he could be a mastermind at destroying pizza - dare he even say in a creative manner - but to do all this? even he hadn't thought of such a demise - to trap someone in a world full of toppings and sauces, with floating pizzas and worlds compromised souly for completing the domino tower to somewhere. that would have been an even better plan to taking over new york! just keep everyone stuck in a void of nothingness!

 

so, after some time of hanging around, he guessed someone really had it out for him. as if he deserved such treatment. he'd never done anything wrong in his entire life, and new york obviously didn't count. nope, he was innocent; a pure hearted soul. if anyone deserved this, it was the noid, not him.

 

he ends up at the top of the tower, after gruelling hours of going through each place. he's thrown onto a black and blue world, and at that point he is beyond pissed off. he swears that whoever's behind this fuckery is going to get a swift punch to the face. as if the noid destroying his robots and ruining his plans wasn't enough humiliation, now he had to put up with this shit too. it was insulting! oh it made him positively  _seethe_!

 

after climbing some static filled tvs and doing some light swinging, he breaks a cracked tv with a die and falls into a large room that architecturely makes no sense. he see's a man on a separate platform hunched behind a desk, looking bored yet interested at the same time, and pure rage boils from his core.

 

'yo, where the fuck am i, crayon man?'

 

his response was silence. it didn't help improve his mood.

 

'can you talk over there, chump?'

 

'whats the matter?' the man finally said, and his voice was all weirdly pitched and robotic. 'did you stink of failure so much you had to change suits, or did red become a boring colour to look pathetic in?' that especially bit at a nerve.

 

'who the _fuck_ do you think you're talkin' to? do i look like that red piece of shit or are you jus' blind _and_ stupid? as if i'd look any good in red anyway! so fuckin' insulting!' the blue haired man looked taken aback and, quite frankly, insulted at his snap.

 

'do you kiss your mother with that mouth?'

 

'my backstory wasn't developed enough for me to honestly answer that question.'

 

'i beg your pardon?'

 

'then **beg**.'

 

the man looked irritated, and he shook his head. 'enough! are you the noid, here to stop my plans, or not?'

 

'the fuck i ain't, chump!' he placed his hands on his hips, frowny eyes deepening in their spite. 'i might look like his twin, but that means fuck all. i ain't as dumb as him, for one, and i make robots - all he does is destroy pizzas- anyway fuck all'a that, are you the bitch that stole my yoyo?' obviously, from the mans bewildered expression and stunned replies, the hellhole he'd experienced hadn't been meant for him. fucking wonderful. 'are you tellin' me,' he began, and he stalked towards the edge of the platform, 'that this entire thing weren't even meant for _me_?'

 

'you look no different! and i'm sure me erasing the world with you in it would make little difference to the outcome! i _am_ going to release the Vocal Noid whether you stop me or not!' the man stood up, hands flat on the desk, determination in his grimace, and mr. green had no clue what the fuck he was going on about. 'that noid is already dead! his five minuets of fame are already over! it means little to me that i get rid of his counterpart too! in fact it would do me more favours getting rid of your pesky existence!' 

 

'watch that mouth'a yours my dude, least you want to keep usin' it.'

 

'HA! what are you going to do? as if you could jump this gap.' now he sounded impossibly smug, and it was in that one moment that mr. green deemed the man to death. ' _i_ programmed this part of the world _specifically_ for this one moment, so there is _no_ way a dead mascot like you could ever make it without needlessly falling to your death over and over again-' he stopped running his mouth when he spotted two green ears in front of his desk, softly bobbing up and down. he peeked over the edge, and saw two beady, angry eyes and a malicious, open-mouthed grin greeting him, his arms swinging by his sides that seemed like a taunt. he didn't even hear his footsteps or his menacing "HEH" when he'd jumped. mr. green hopped onto the desk with ease, a mitten-gloved hand clenched tightly into mike's vest, and suddenly he was face to uncomfortable face with the not-mascot. there was no way mr. green was allowing someone to continue living if they compared him to the noid.

 

'told you i weren't that red bastard, shit for brains.' 

 

and now he's stuck in that world, because he killed mike by punching him in the face so god damn hard his metallic brain exploded out the back of his head. he's pretty sure his hand is broken, but it's not his yoyo-ing hand, so he's relatively fine with it. the world is now, by definition, saved, since mike is dead and the vocal noid was never truly allowed to be released for the world to dematerialise, but the heavenly spire never returned to its place either. mr. green got out of ??? ??? and returned back to the ~~noid~~ void, and upon finding out that nothing had changed in terms of his freedom, he figured "fuck it, this is my new home now. even if it sucks ass". 

 

so he lives there with all the other toppings and a broken hand, and he supposed things could be ultimately worse, and it's a kinda happy ending i guess


End file.
